You grew up, ensuring that you did well at school and at the university. You met your spouse, found a good job, good pay somehow, and later you decided to get married. Then you’re in your honeymoon stage..
And then.. your wife is pregnant..and you’ll soon have a baby!
And that is the stage where your life is no longer as important as the one who is coming very very soon. You put a dot there, and it is not about ME ME ME anymore.
Once you have a child of your own, your life does no longer revolve around you (AND your spouse). Naturally, a lot of efforts will be dedicated and committed for your child. No matter what it takes, it is always your child that you prioritize the most. When he is at the baby stage, you want to make sure he/she is fed well, grown up well and you want to ensure that he/she grows up as a healthy toddler. You would also want he develops his motor skills very soon, and you would also want him, at the toddler stage to be able to understand your instruction, be able to read, write, count and so on. The faster, the better. My baby is a genius!
Then, he enters the kindergarten. Is it the stage where you want him to be able to interact with others well, or only be able to read, write and count?
Then, he enters the primary school. What actually do we want him to be able to do? Getting number 1 every year in the class and score 100% for all the subjects he learnt?
Then, he enters the secondary school. What actually do we want him to be able to do? Getting straight A’s in their PMR/PT3 as well as SPM? And then, what? Getting a scholarship and going to the prestigious university, doing the course that you’d want to do but you cant long time ago, but now you asked your child to do it. Be a doctor, daughter. Be an engineer, son. Study until you get a PhD, son.
And that is the mentality that has parked in our mind, the Malaysians, for ages. We are putting too much to emphasize intellectual capability among our kids, which actually to feed our nafs and desire. Then, we forgo about instilling good values in them. Never mind, let him be an arrogant or ego or snobbish guy, as long as he got straight As in his SPM and CGPA 4.0 at his university.
Or probably, never mind of him not having the courtesy to help others in need, or at least know how to boil an egg or cook the rice or hang and fold the laundry at the age of 15, as long as he’s a scorer at his school. Or perhaps, never mind of him not being observant to the surrounding, or not having a common sense when meeting with other adults or being a guest at other people’s house and keep asking for wi-fi password, because he wanted to play online games, as long as he did his homework and being his teacher’s favourite? Is it what we really want?
These are what actually concern me, and my wife the most. Our kids are the best asset that we have, and our biggest investment in this world. It is not for worldly gain, but importantly for the akhirah. For the day of judgment. So their dua will make us enter the heaven. And we also prayed for our kids to become the change agent in the society, i.e. those who are not only think about themselves only to go to His jannah, but to bring others as well into that direction. This is what we dreamed since when we’re in London, after being exposed to their good culture for years, and seeing the world as a traveler. Becoming soleh and musleh. Becoming those who are changing and bring the changes to others.
However, being in Malaysia, we have not much choice, but to remain, to stay strong.
This morning, I represented my university to attend a briefing on Malaysia higher education blueprint (2015-2025) in Ipoh. This session was brought by QIUP, Quest International University PERAK, and the talk was delivered by Prof Dr Zita Mohd Fahmi, the MQA Consultant Advisor, and she highlighted the important matters in this blueprint. This blueprint will be launched on 6 April by the PM. The planning was fantastic, the contents are superb. Most importantly, it is about balancing the knowledge/thinking and the values/akhlaq.
Then I popped out a question, because I always believed in ‘melentur buluh biarlah daripada rebungnya’, and I said, how do we stuff all of these within 3-4 years of program at the university, whereas our feedstock was not groom well, let say in terms of akhlaq? How do we bridge the gaps?
And yes, she agreed that the education system that we have right now, need to be improvised. For how long, I dont know. And that is the issue when the universities and the schools are not talking to each other. And I am bogged down as well with the parents, teachers, academicians, administrators and those in the government’s mentality that are so difficult to be corrected. Somehow, I felt doomed, because there are so many improvements that need to be done in shifting the mindset of the Malaysians. And I felt Allah pull away His mercy from us, the Malaysians, sadly. Yet, we felt lonely because we felt that we are fighting alone with the BIG currents and BIG waves that kept coming to us.
We want a better Malaysia, and a better education system for our kids, but things change slowly and we are just being strong, for our kids. Fortunately for our kids, they have us. Yet, we pity other kids too, whose parents are busy chasing their own dream, and forgetting their biggest investment that they made in this world.
May Allah make us stronger and stronger to make these changes. And may Allah make our kids to continue fighting for this mission, if we are no longer here in this world. But yes, we surely didnt want to miss the changes. It is not only for our kids, but it is for our future generation.
Moga Allah redha.