Based on our observation, my wife and I came to the point that, yes, young parents in Malaysia who both are working and yet they have many kids (1 or more) can suffer a very stressful life especially in this current modern society. We’ve seen many working mums and dads who are busy with their career can easily slip their way in parenting their kids. Sometimes, you became so edgy without you realizing it and you turned to be a monster in your kids’ eyes. In this current society, where money is important, things can go haywire at home, when things went haywire at the office earlier and vice versa. We worked hard for our family, but the family (the kids) as well need us. Juggling to balance both seems so hard. Seeing a mother or a father became angry like a monster to their young age kids, just because the kids were not behaving well, really disheartened me.
Alhamdulillah, post-PhD and post-hajj experiences really allow us to re-focus and re-define our life. I’d say, that would be the advantage for the young couple to perform hajj earlier because you are not only re-aligning your life, but whoever under your responsibility such as the kids at young age became part of the realignment process too. Where will we be in the coming years, who we are at that particular time, it is all depends on where we wanted our kids to grow and experience their life. Yes, to a certain extent you need money to move but it will not be our biggest priority. As long as we are free from debt (ameen!) and have some extra cash so that we can do charity is sufficient, Insha Allah. Whatever that we obtained along the way in our career life, is a bonus for us, as long as the kids grow up becoming a God-fearing servant, full of knowledge and wisdom, stay healthy, as well as with good akhlaq and common sense.
Let’s have patience with our kids, because they are our precious, they are our biggest investment that will lead our path to jannah. May Allah make us steadfast with our deen. Ameen.